20 up

No posts in September. Just a short one now, with about 10 minutes to go till I turn 20.

Its kind of scary. These 10 minutes are the less 10 minutes I have as a teenager. Age wise, I'll already be an adult (though I'll have to wait another year before that holds true law wise as well).

Change is difficult, but most of the time, it has been for the better. If I were to divide my teenage years, there would be a few categories. Lower secondary, upper sec, college and university. And if I think about it, each of those has, in some way or another, contributed to making me the person I am today.

I became involved with NUS Stage this semester, and the production I'm doing, (Post-Traffic Barrier) has a number of running themes. Memory, time and journeys. These interrelated elements constitute us, and represent things we can never run away from. Some people believe that we should never look back. What's past is past and there's no use thinking about things that have already happened.

In a sense, they are right. But I see things a bit differently. For me, dwelling on the past is bad, but looking back is a good thing. We remember. The experiences, the people. We reflect. They may seem like little pinpricks of little significance. But, they have all in some way shaped us.

And I look forward too. To new things to see, learn and do. I'm lucky. Our parents always tell us that, and tell us to think of those who have not been granted the fortune that we have, to be able to look at the future with optimism. For this I am thankful.

In Postvorta (the other production) the main character says that in Roman mythology, there was Antevorta, the goddess of the future; and there was Postvorta, goddess of the past. Postvorta drew the short straw, he tells us. For me, each is just as important as the other. We look back, and we look forward. The past makes us who we are, the future gives us the chance to go beyond that.

Birthdays. Temporal markers, but also times of reflection, and expectation.